When Nothing Gets Accomplished…

For most of the year, we’ve been keeping on top of our schoolwork. Well, let me rephrase:  We’ve been keeping fairly on top of our schoolwork.

Homeschooling isn’t like regular school, though, and life interferes sometimes – like a quick trip to the Big City that wasn’t really so quick and actually took up FOUR school-scheduled days and we didn’t actually get any schooling done there either despite packing all our stuff with us. And then there’s sick days. Mama sick days, to be precise. Not much goes on then, for sure. And then there’s days like today.

Where for no reason whatsoever, the child just refuses to cooperate or learn. And stares at you with a blank face and slowly, ever so s-l-o-w-l-y tries to pretend she’s doing what you tell her do, but it’s all sorts of wrong, because there is nobody home in there and there is nothing you can do about it.

I’ve never been a teacher at public school. I don’t know what they do with the kids when they do this at school. Probably something a lot more sympathetic than what I did, which was to instruct her to continue to stare into space and keep her head empty because she’s so good at it while I take the dog out for a pee.

Yeah…. well, that got me all her papers thrown on the floor and a letter written to me. Here it is:

My child. My child does not get the point of school. I can’t even breathe here. I can’t even think. How is this possible?!

I wrote back:

“Dearest Big Girl, The point of school is to get smarter so you are not stupid. Love, Mom. PS – it’s spelled “school”.”

Yeahh… so, maybe that doesn’t win the Mom of the Year Award, but HONESTLY, CHILD. You have to learn to read! I’m not asking for a thesis paper, for the love of god! I want you to learn to read words!!!!

Needless to say, between the pair of us childish bums, nothing much got accomplished today. We went to my mothers, and she went to the library on the pretense of looking at books, but really to access youtube which is totally banned at my house and not so restricted there. And then we went to a Girl Scout signup and she made a dorky little butterfly craft out of clothespins and coffee filters with the little kids. And then I wound up chatting with my cousin the public school teacher there because I needed a somewhat sane adult to talk to, and then it was like, time for dinner and chores and reading and bed.

Reading, you say? Hey, there’s some schoolwork!

Um. No. She “read” the Oriental Trading catalog. Yup. You know, I wouldn’t even mind if she really was reading it – there are words in there!! Product descriptions and whatnot. Hardly literature, but reading is reading, right? Yeah, no. She’s not reading anything. Just looking at shiny pictures.

So that, folks, is how I roll with it some days. We didn’t learn much, but… sometimes… you just don’t. I haven’t figured out how to crack open her skull and pour knowledge in, and until I do, we have to work within her limitations.

However. This weekend? Yeah, we’re totally schooling it up this weekend.

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